Do you feel like things haven’t been going right lately, or like you are hitting a rut? Maybe you’re overweight, struggling with your finances, or feeling isolated from your family, friends, or potential relationships. When you’re feeling like you’ve hit rock bottom, it can feel overwhelming to think about action and about taking charge to change the circumstances in your life.
In order to make your life better you need to start taking action!
The journey of 1000 miles starts with one small step, and anyone has the power to begin changing their life for the better even will this small step.
I’m Adam Law, a psychotherapist, public speaker, chaplin and life coach, dedicated to guiding individuals that are in need of a change, or who would like to turn around their lives despite circumstances that might be very difficult.
Breaking the Depression Loop
Many of us fall into a “depression loop.” This is when Inside, you’re feeling sad because things aren’t going good, so you avoid taking action, and then good things don’t happen to you which only leads to you continuing to not take action and more negative outcomes occurring and so your feelings of depression get stronger eventually leading you to hitting rock bottom. This depression loop can feel inescapable, but the key to freedom is to take action even if taking action feels like an impossible feat. For example, let’s say you lost your job and the last thing you want to do is start looking for another job, instead of laying down for days or weeks waiting for the negative feelings to pass or for you to “recharge”, taking action is the best course of action.
When you’re feeling incredibly low, even the smallest action can make a difference. Each small step, whether it’s mailing out resumes, taking a shower, going for a hike or brisk walk, or engaging in some exercising, can create a more positive loop breaking the depression loop you may have fallen into. These little steps add up; the actions you take release endorphins and provide a sense of satisfaction, that will gradually improve your mood and spirit and will help motivate you to continue taking actions towards your well being.
The Power of Small Steps
Whether you have met your goals or taken a small step towards them, take a moment at the end of each day to acknowledge your achievements.
Sent out ten resumes? Amazing! Worked out today? Fantastic.
The more you take these small steps, the sense of satisfaction and accomplishment adds up and will pull you out of the depression loop you had originally fell into.
If you speak to any successful person they will all tell you the same thing, “I was you at one point and then I committed to improving my life and with time it all changed." In reality it takes ten thousand hours to become an expert at something. For instance you’re not really going to see the effects of exercise until 3-6 weeks after you start working out. You’re not going to get the job you want until you learn the skills to have the job well enough.
The key to success isn’t something that can be applied overnight to see results, you need to be persistent and develop resilience. Every successful person at one point faced setbacks, rejection, and failure. You have to be willing putting in the necessary hours to become the master at the skills you need to improve your life. Whether it’s working out or learning to gain the confidence or social skills to get the relationship you want, or the course you need to take and the resumes you need to send out to get job, these are all tasks that must get done to reach your ultimate life satisfaction, and get into a positive loop rather than a depression one.
Embracing Challenges as Growth Opportunities
When life seems hardest, it’s actually presenting you with the greatest opportunities for growth. Recognizing that you aren’t at your goal because of your own short comings presents you with the key of exactly what you need to practice or learn to achieve your goals. If everything was easily achievable, we wouldn’t appreciate any of our successes or spend additional time developing the character or resilience you would need for long-term success.
Imagine having no obstacles in the pursuit of your goals, becoming complacent, and then one day losing everything that was handed to you. The person I just described wouldn’t have developed the tools that are forged through adversity and challenges. Without these tools, it would be incredibly difficult to get back up, take the necessary steps, and achieve everything on your own again.
However, having obstacles come up on the way to success can be the perfect opportunity for reflection and growth.
Struggling with feelings of anger? It’s a chance to work on your emotional regulation. Rejected from a job? It’s a sign to work on the skills you would have needed to succeed.
Embracing these challenges of life is ultimately the key to making an individual stronger. Taking those first few steps, small or big towards your goals no matter how unmotivated you are, will give you that sense of gratification that will motivate you to keep on trying until you succeed. Breaking the depression loop is equally a matter of shifting your mindset in addition to taking action.
Shifting Your Mindset
A negative mindset can be a significant barrier to progress. Many people view the difficulties they are experiencing, through a lens of self-doubt and pessimism. Often times, the feelings someone has towards themselves or their circumstances can be reflected in the way they perceive the world. For instance, Someone might feel like no one has a reason to like them because they don’t like themselves, so they automatically assume their friends “hate them”. Although this perception may not be the truth as an individual in this case is underestimating their worth.
As a psychotherapist, I often see clients who underestimate their potential. They describe their lives as going badly and describe themselves as unattractive, undeserving or unsuccessful when in reality I see someone that has so much potential who needs to alter their mindset, believe in themselves and take action.
What is great about therapy is that you are offered a platform where you are supported, and believed in, held accountable and through CBT have the chance to observe and question these negative narratives you tell yourself until these negative thoughts can be replaced with positive thoughts and self belief.
Taking Action and Avoiding Negative Habits
While taking action is necessary, giving up bad habits that impede your success is just as critical. Stop using video games, food, drugs, or social media as ways to escape your issues. All these distractions do is keep you from making the essential changes to your life.
In addition to your good deeds, take care of any addictions or other bad habits you may have. Removing these bad habits will assist you in maintaining motivation and attention.
Creating a Plan and Holding Yourself Accountable
If therapy is too expensive right now, make a thorough plan that outlines the actions you must do every day in order to stay on course. Make use of a calendar to plan your tasks and establish reminders to help you remember to do them. Procrastination and ADHD sufferers can find the structure very helpful.
Don't forget to think about getting help from a mentor, coach, or psychotherapist. By having someone to hold you accountable and believe in you, your path to life satisfaction, success and self-belief can be positively impacted more efficiently than on your own.
Remember, your goals that might seem impossible today are closer the second you take that small first step. With the guidance of a psychotherapist you can identify where you want to be, how to get there, and be supported to stay committed to your goals until you can gain the confidence and belief in yourself to achieve your goals on your own whilst knowing where you are going.
If you’re ready to take the first step towards a better life, I’m here to help. Contact me through the contact form below for a free consultation or click the book now button and let’s work together to overcome your challenges and achieve your goals. You can do it, and you’re worth it.
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